Been A Few Days, Hasn’t It?

Sorry about missing the past few days.  My schedule got changed around thanks to some training at work, putting me on an 8-5 schedule that completely messed with my head.  How do those of you who work that shift on a regular basis manage to cope?  I mean, there was this burning orb in the sky as I drove to work, and it was dinner time by the time I left the office!


The weekend was not productive in terms of my goals.  However, things are starting to look up, thanks to meeting with my new personal trainer for the first time yesterday (nothing against my last personal trainer, mind – it’s just that this one is only a five minute drive from my house).  The first thing we did was sit down and talk about what I was trying to achieve, and why I was trying to achieve it, and who I was trying to achieve it for.  So, because it’s useful to remind myself of these things, here’s what I said.

I’m trying to get myself back on track.  Nearly two years ago, I set out to lose two hundred pounds.  At one point I was down 120 of those pounds, but then things happened and I stalled out.  Those things were, specifically, various health issues combined with getting burnt out.  But I’m in no mood to give up, and recognize that I need help getting back on track.

I’m trying to achieve this goal because I got scared.  I was morbidly obese, I needed three different blood pressure medications, and my doctor was concerned I was diabetic.  At the time I was 43, and I had a 4 year old and a wife, and the odds were good that I wasn’t going to make it to see him graduate or to retire with my wife.  Also, I was disgusted with myself and the way I looked and felt, and I wanted to change.  But, let’s be honest here (because you can always go back and read my first posts), it was the fear that got me started.

My “anchor” – the reason I have for doing all this – is my family.  Me, and my wife, and my son.  I want to be able to keep up with my son.  I’m 45 now, after all, and he’s 6.  Occasionally, people think I’m his grandfather (which is within the realms of mechanical possibility, but would have required both me and my hypothetical son to have had kids between ages 18 and 20).  I don’t want him to miss out on having an active father because I’m older or because I’m unable to do things with him.  Oh, and I want to be around to see my (obviously hypothetical at this point) grandchildren when they come along.  People in my family live into their late 80s on average, so there’s no reason why I shouldn’t be able to do so.

I also want to be able to be there for my wife, both now and in retirement.  We have plans.  We want to travel, and go see things, and spend more time hiking and exploring.  I clearly can’t do that, if I can barely walk.  Or if I’m bedridden or housebound because of my health.

And I want to feel better.  The way I feel now, with only a little over half of my ultimate goal achieved, is a vast improvement from how I used to feel.  I’m more active.  I sleep better.  I’m happier with the way I look.  And I want that to continue.

So, that’s what I came up with, answering my trainer’s questions.  Then we spent a good amount of time checking my balance, and the way I move, and my initial workout was something I didn’t expect.  For this week, my exercise is primarily to pay attention to my posture.  Shoulders back, head up, butt in, and walk standing up straight.  And sit, standing up straight.  Also, there’s this exercise I need to do each day, where I clench a ball between my knees and try to press my lower back against the floor, and I’m having a hard time describing it better than that.

It sounded… ridiculous.  That’s all?  But, after just half a day of trying to mindfully stand up straight and walk as prescribed, I’m feeling it in my back and shoulders.  So, clearly, there’s something to this.

I’m excited!  Can you tell?


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