The Goaldrums

So, the office party went well yesterday. Mostly finger food was served – albeit finger food like “tenderloin bites with mashed potatoes” and “stromboli” and “beef sliders” – so I grazed a bit and I think I stayed within my calorie budget. I had to do a whole lot of estimating, so it’s hard to be 100% certain. And with that in mind, let me get my check-in out of the way. I estimated my calorie consumption at 2,184, and FitBit tells me I burned 3,892 calories. So, not too bad. I only walked 3.91 miles, for reasons. Mostly, reasons revolving around getting incredibly busy at work and not managing to hit any reasonable walking distance on my breaks, and then being extremely tired.

Which brings me to the topic, today. The goaldrums.  A portmanteau of “goal” and “doldrums“.  We’ll define it as a noun, and as “a dull, listless, depressed mood about one’s goals or objectives”.  And it’s a good description of where I’m at, right now.  Maybe it’s just fatigue.  Maybe it’s the grey weather and the early mornings.  But I just feel listless and apathetic, and I’m having to struggle to meet any of my health and exercise goals.  Making breakfast and packing lunch?  Bah.  Getting my 5.3 miles in?  Meh.  Getting my exercise cards done?  Whatever.

It’s a weird sensation. Not like I’ve given up, because I’m still making the effort. It’s not like I don’t care, because I still do. It’s not even like I don’t enjoy what I’m doing, because I still like the walking and the exercise and such. It just seems… I dunno. Almost like too much bother.

Honestly, it’s probably the weather. Grey and dreary and just cold enough to need a heavier coat than my fall coat while not being cold enough to justify my winter coat. And the short days. It’s kind of discouraging to watch it get pitch black out by 6 pm, and by 7 pm I feel like it’s midnight and I just want to hibernate. And, of course, December is a busy month – a fact that has already thrown me off schedule (and it’s only December third!).

Interestingly enough, I’m already feeling a little better just from admitting that I’m struggling right now. And I’m realizing that at least half of the struggle is the fact that I am off schedule. So, rather than complain about it and slack off, I suppose I should put a new plan into place that accounts for the realities of the busy holiday season.

I will think on this. In the mean time, enjoy some Christmas music!

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